I absolutely LOVE this poem. Dana Gilmore performed this LIVE on Def Poetry Jam, a spoken word TV series which aired on HBO and was hosted by Mos Def.
This poem is PART 2 of the first one I posted. [Click → here]
This was on Season 4- Episode 5 (August 15, 2004)
I’m tired of peeking out my window and seeing shadows of you. I can't roll out with my girls without checking my
rear view. Your callin', breathin' all hard on my phone like I can't hear you.
I had to compete with clubs, drugs, the streets and PS2.
Out chasin’ women with your weak ass crew. I guess when you’re in Rome you do what the Romans do
But, they go home alone--just like you. Wishing they would've held on--just like you
Probably callin’, playin’ on phones–just like you. I’m so through dealing with n***as– just like you
And I've had a few n***as--just like you
Had the ballin’ type, who call all night and keep claimin’ he’s coming through
Had the CEO, who would bring me dough cause he always had something to prove
Had the so-called god-man, that think he can do everything God can. So he closer to God than the church man,
Had the meet me at the poetry spot down to earth man
Had the man from the club who was only good for a fuck. Had the street man who kept claiming he was down on his luck
Had the playa with no goals, no heart, just game. Had the 24 in the studio on his way to fame
Had the control freak who thought he could keep me on a chain.
Had a man that lied so much I don’t even know his real name
But fuck it ‘cause at the end of the night they all made me feel the same.
I had a million things to lose and not a damn thing to gain
I guess DMX said it best, you gotta let a dog roam. But many nights you never found your way home
You left me to fight this war alone
I sacrificed my own blood and sweat. Yet, you wanna collect benefits like you was the Vet
Poppin’ off at the mouth sayin’ shit Ja-Rule would've said like “love is pain” and “pain is love”
I tell you I need you and I watch your shoulders shrug. I tell you I’m leavin’ and you call my bluff
I tell you many men want me; You say ‘they can have you then’
So when you beg me to come back I tell you I gotta man. Not just a lover but a friend
The closest person to me so I call him my next of kin and I know you think you own this. But guess what, he put it in
And represented for all men. Even those that act like boys but we still call men
And he goes all out for me so when he needs me I'm all in. Cause we went from walkin to runnin' in spaces we used to crawl in
You think you gone fall in feedin' me bullshit sprinkled with game on it
But, when he hit it he wrote his name on it. I was committed when he put his brain on it
He and I will parade the streets and I’ll be damned if you rain on it you say it ain’t over yet
I’m not concerned with your threats you can come here filled with hot air but you’ll leave tryin’ to catch your breath
I told you I was close to empty. But you wouldn't believe ‘till there was nothing left. To busy pokin’ out your chest
What kind of man chooses the streets over hot meals and good sex? Look, I know you have regrets
I’m not going to throw it in your face----hell, I wish you the best. But him for you is like more for less
I just can’t do it. You had your chance but you blew it. Deep inside I think you knew it was killing me. But, silly me
I couldn't see the forest for the trees and I didn't know I was cut so deep until I began to bleed
I guess they left out all the snakes in the story of birds and bees
So you can cry me a river
N***a, cry me a sea
But, that’s the last time I’ll love a n***a
That, ain’t got love for me.
-Dana Gilmore
